


The Misadventures of Lady Vader

by AugustusFeuer



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Adventure, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Crack Treated Seriously, Drama, Dysfunctional Family, Gen, Genderfuck, Humor, Light-Hearted, Rule 63
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-13
Updated: 2016-01-13
Packaged: 2018-05-13 18:44:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 579
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5713069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AugustusFeuer/pseuds/AugustusFeuer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>DISCONTINUED // A long time ago in a faraway galaxy, a healthy baby was born to the Empress Vader, whose House has ruled for centuries. Unfortunately, their joy was short lived, for their child was a girl and thus, unfit to inherit the throne. The Emperor's adviser, however, had an idea to keep their rival, House Palpatine, from finding it out...</p><p>(fem!Anakin/Vader royal AU.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Misadventures of Lady Vader

_Utter chaos._ Those were the only words capable of describing the disaster in the birthing room. Empress Vader, usually the picture of regal calmness, was having a duet with her newborn child, almost shattering her husband's—and the midwives'—eardrums. She felt like cursing a thousand time for her predicament, cursing the world and the gods and her husband and the whole galaxy...

* * *

_Shmi sighed in content as she snuggled in the crook of her husband's neck, showering the calloused skin with kisses._

  
_His muscular hands wrapped tighter around her. "I can feel him already," he hummed, his beard grazing the top of her head. "He will make a fine ruler."_

  
_"He shall be our pride," the Empress prayed. "Our House's pride."_

  
_The Emperor didn't respond for quite a while, and she used the moment to just live and feel their heartbeats become one, her duties be damned..._

  
_His sudden trances always unnerved her, though. But oh, how she wished she'd had his clairvoyance! She'd wanted a son since forever! Was his vision of doom, or of glory?_  
_Would her son be safe? Would he... Would he..._

  
_"He will thrive," the Emperor finally breathed out, and the couple found themselves in another place and time..._

  
_Their son, face obscured by an unseen force and dressed in an opulent ceremonial garb, waved from the top of a pedestal, an endless crowd cheering for him. An older Sabé, ever the loyal handmaiden, could be seen behind him, her face alight with pride._

  
_Scenes flashed, one by one, and then stopped abruptly at the sound of cannons._

  
_Lord Vader stood tall, battle-scarred yet powerful, a blood-red blade in hand._

  
_Gruesome remains of enemy soldiers filled the battlefield, their insides mingling with the grime and dirt below. He then looked up and faced the crowd, blue eyes blazing with the fire of triumph._

  
_"We won," he declared. The crowd erupted into a celebration like never before._

  
_His voice was pitched considerably higher than his father's, but the strength, the command, the way it seemed to reverberate in every warrior's soul, was unmistakable. Shmi felt tears of joy run down her cheeks_. Oh, my gods, thank you...

* * *

With a jolt, the Empress was back in the surgical table.

 

From her peripheral vision, she caught sight of Sabé, carrying her daughter to—her  _daughter!_ she cried, knowing that none of her husband's premonitions would come to pass—She hoped it was to Hell or to another surgical procedure, for Force's sake, the last thing she wished was for the House of Palpatine to rule! Curse Jade, why did she have to be pregnant as well?!

  
_"Silence!"_ Emperor Vader thundered, his deep voice echoing in the stone walls, creating the most frightening sound both female Vaders and Sabé had ever heard., but he couldn't care less about their reaction. "Sabé."

  
The young woman quickly slid over to her master, dark eyes fixed to the baby's closed ones. "My lord," she said quietly, bowing. A thin sheen of sweat coating her neck was the only visible sign of her nervousness. "How may I be of service?"

  
"Clean this mess... _immediately_ ," he commanded, icy eyes never leaving his wife's fearful ones. "And you," he spat, narrowed golden eyes boring into Shmi's. "We will discuss this later, _wife_."

  
The Empress, due to the combined stress of childbirth and the unforeseen circumstances concerning her child, slumped back to her pillow, weeping, and didn't wake up for a long, long time.

**Author's Note:**

> Yay... for fantastic Star Wars sexism? Idk. But I'd be glad to hear some of your thoughts!
> 
> Reg


End file.
